Good man in a Storm
by audiodream
Summary: Arizona's life is going great...until the hits start coming. Will her and Callie be able to survive? Will everything that keeps creeping out of her past ruin what she has? And will Seattle Grey manage to overcome one huge secret?
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything, and I make no profit out of it.

A/N: please review if you like it or even if you don't, if anyone has any ways I could improve it then please let me know.

CHAPTER ONE

For Arizona Robbins she felt as if she was on a never ending rollercoaster. Her life was just full of so many bumps and she never knew which way was up. This time though that wasn't the problem. No, this time she had no idea how to get there but at last she knew which way was definitely up.

It had started as a nice quiet romantic meal, simple but special and with the woman she loved. Tonight was the night, _**the**_ night she would tell Callie that she loved her. She had planned all day exactly how she was going to tell her, whether or not to just come out and say it as soon as she came in, or wait till after dinner and perhaps show her as well. She had been smiling so much all day that ever her colleagues had commented. That was unusual as they all knew of her cheery nature by now. Even Miranda Bailey was blown away and they had worked together the most since she joined the hospital.

The table was all set up with lit candles and Callie's favourite red wine. She had even cooked her favourite meal - well attempted too at least. It probably wouldn't taste much like it but she hoped Callie saw her line of thought and enjoyed it never the less. Even if she chickened out and didn't say it, which was doubtful as it had been on the tip of her tongue for weeks now, she hoped her feelings would come across in her actions. She loved Calliope Torres and wanted her to know.

Even if she didn't feel the same yet, or couldn't say it back Arizona was prepared for that. She just wanted her to know how _**she**_ felt about the Ortho surgeon.

Stepping in front of her mirror she checked for the tenth time for creases in her dress. She wanted everything to be perfect. Like everything else her dress was simple but elegant, a little black dress she had bought last week with Callie when they had gone shopping.

Everything was set for a brilliant night, all that was needed now was Callie and she was due in ten minutes. Just enough time to make the salad, another one of Callie's favourites.

-

Twenty five minutes later and still no show of her. Arizona had to put the lasagne on a lower setting so it wouldn't burn although it was getting a little crispy around the edges. It had takes her ages to get the topping just right.

-

Two hours later and still no Callie. She had long since turned the oven off and threw the lasagne in the bin. The candles had burnt down to nothing more than a puddle of melted wax that burnt her fingers as she repeatedly poked it. She wasn't naive enough to think that Callie would be turning up tonight and any hope of that had been dashed when she had called Bailey to put Callie on the phone and she informed her that Callie had gone to the bar across the street, Joe's, with Mark Sloane and the others.

Arizona was fairly certain the numbness in her face was due to the bottle of red wine she had ingested in the last hour. Standing up and blowing out the candles, or what was left of them, she grabbed her house keys and headed out of the apartment. She wouldn't mope around tonight in her apartment while Callie was out drinking it up. No she wouldn't just sit there waiting for Callie IF she decided she wanted to show up tonight. No, Arizona Robbins would not mope or moan because that wasn't who she was. Who she had been brought up to be. She was a good man in the storm.

-

Arizona had always been her daddies girl. She always had been, right from when she was born. She wasn't the tom boy type, she was into barbies and she used to be a cheerleader, but she took whatever her father said as gospel. Everything he had to say she was interested in. To her his little bits of advice and knowledge on the world were like gold. She treasured them with all her heart. That's why when she walked through the doors of Joe's she had the biggest smile on her face, big enough to brighten up the whole room.

'Never let them see through to your heart baby girl, that's where they can really hurt you. Sticks and stones and all that.'

So her Dad may be a little guarded but he had a point. Tonight wasn't the first time she had been hurt, and it wouldn't be the last. She just had to remember to keep herself more protected then this wouldn't hurt. Then she would expect it. Tonight was going to be their night, the night she said those three magical words but it couldn't be now because it was ruined. But she shouldn't be upset, because it wasn't her that was missing out no it was Callie. Now she wouldn't hear those words from her anytime soon, now she would have to say them first because this hurt, this pain wasn't something she was going to risk again soon.

Callie and the rest of them were sat at the bar, Mark and her doing shots of something that resembled tequila. Meredith and Derek smiling at each other and sharing little whispers obviously in love and oblivious to the rest of the world. Christina was seemingly already drunk much like herself, and lacking Owen Hunt who seemed to be attached to her recently. That probably the reason she had drunk so much. Mark was hugging Lexie Grey, the most mismatched couple here and yet they were shining obviously good for each other. Alex Karev was also very drunk along with Christina, apparently also drowning his sorrows probably because of Izzie's disappearance.

"Hey! How's everyone?!" In her usual cheerful tone, slightly slurred from the wine that seems to be affecting her quite a bit. She wasn't used to drinking this much, in fact she's pretty sure she hadn't consumed this much since college. Callie, for the best part, looked happy to see Arizona. She was a little confused how the blond was already so drunk having only just arrived. She knew she hadn't been at work, she had finished early today. She knew it hadn't been fair to the blond, just to not show up but they hadn't had anything specific planned and after hearing what her father had told her she was still reeling. Besides the blond looked happy enough, she had obviously not even noticed her absence.

"Hey." "Hi." as well as a few grunts from Christina and Karev and a Hello Dr Robbins from Lexie and everyone moved over for the blond to fit between Christina and Callie. It was a mix match of moods, some where merry, some joyful others depressed and staring into the bottom of a whisky glass. Arizona wasn't sure what to order. She fancied staring in the bottom of the empty glass.

"I'll have a cocktail, surprise me!" Arizona chirped at the bar man. Not Joe, Joe seemed to not be there. It was a first. Callie smiled at the blonds choice of drink, it was just so her. It was endearing. She quickly wiped her smile off of her face remembering her fathers words.

_'She told me she loves you mija,she really does. I'm...happy for you.'_

_**That**_ scared Callie. She wasn't ready for that was she? That always, always led to bad things. With George, Erica and everyone else she thought she had loved they always broke her heart. Besides that did she really want to be tied down at her age? I mean she didn't think she was the youngest girl in the room but she was by far not the oldest and she couldn't picture herself doing that, settling down.

"Urgh! If you're going to be cheery you can leave" Christina, not even bothering to look up at Arizona as she spoke. Arizona pouted at her.

"Cheery, well excuse me...Christina," momentarily forgetting the surgeons name in her alcohol induced state, "I happen to have lots of reason to be cheery, as do you. So I'm going to sip on my fruity cocktail and hope for the best. Unlike you, you should...be....ashamed...yes ashamed of yourself. You watch people all day dying and there's nothing you can do to help you watch them wither and die...and your...helpless.." She frowns, grabs Christina's whisky and downs it.

Callie can't help but laugh, it seems her blond girlfriend talked herself into being upset.

"Don't you laugh. I just wanted to know what whisky tastes like. I haven't had any since college." The blond wrinkles her brow in thought, and a smile creeps up on her face. "then again...I haven't done _**a lot**_ since college." Mark immediately latches onto that, begging the blond to continue with that train of thought. Arizona isn't interested though the song that's playing has caught her attention and she remembers her mission of having a good time tonight. She wants to dance.

-

Christina looks out along the bar and can't help but laugh at the sight she see's. Arizona Robbins, the always conservative and always cheery PEDs surgeon is trying to coerce one of her new Mercy West interns into dancing with her. She keeps calling him Melvin and is trying to dance with him whilst he is seated. The funniest part for Christina is that his name is not Melvin and that his date is looking ready to slap either '_Melvin'_ or Arizona, or both.

Christina's chuckles, so out of the ordinary, gain the attention of the rest. They all find it equally amusing, including Callie as she knows her girlfriend isn't into men so he is no threat. It's when Arizona tries pulling '_Melvin'_ up onto the bar that she's thrown out of the bar. Now that's when they all burst out laughing whilst grabbing their coats and following the blond out.

Arizona can't believe she's been thrown out of Joe's, when the others find her she's sat on the pavement with tears of laughter streaming out of her eyes as she holds her stomach. They're all bewildered, they've never seen Arizona like this before. Normally she just sits with them, carrying on conversation with a drink or two, normally wine. Tonight Arizona is really in the spirit with living in the party.

"Hey Torres, I think you should take her home. We'll see you all tomorrow, we're going to...play scrabble." Mark says whilst winking and dragging a compliant Lexie Grey with him.

"They're not going to play scrabble." Arizona says pointing at what she hopes is Mark Sloane and Lexie Grey, not a bus. She decides she doesn't want to be on the floor anymore and grabs onto Christina's arm. Christina is pretty drunk herself so that doesn't help her and now they're both on the floor with Christina laying on top of her. She can't help but laugh at the situation she's gotten herself in. "Christina, I'm with Callie." She can't stop the laughs though and wraps her arms around her. To her surprise Christina laughs right along with her and doesn't move to get up. In any other situation they would be both mortified but the alcohol as well as the ridiculousness of the situation has the two surgeons on the floor laughing. Being the only ones left Meredith, Derek and Callie look on in wonderment at the two normally so different surgeons getting on like best friends. It's a disturbing site. Callie suddenly realises Derek and Meredith have hailed a cab and are planning on leaving her.

"No... No way you can't leave me with these two on my own. They're drunk, like really, REALLY drunk. Please, I'll do anything." She pleaded, she didn't know how she was going to manage getting TWO drunks home, and they were so very drunk.

"Bye Callie, see you all tomorrow." Meredith said as she climbed in the car...and then there were three. Callie sighed looking at the laughing messes on the floor.


	2. Chapter 2

They had gotten home surprisingly easily considering Christina and Arizona's state, Callie had had to help them now and again with their walking up the pavement to her apartment but asides from that they had managed ok. Both Arizona and Christina had bonded over calling the cab driver Melvin the entire ride and had both called his head a crystal ball and rubbed it in such a manner. To say Callie had to promise to tip him ALOT after that ride was not an exaggeration. Safe to say he'd never stop to pick them up again.

Arizona had nearly forgotten why she was so upset earlier, here she was having a ball with a drunken Christina and Callie didn't look nearly as amused as she was in the bar. Knowing she had maybe, just a little, wrecked Callie's plans for the night made her feel a little bit better. Christina on the other hand was completely unaware as the why she had wanted to get so drunk in the first place, all she knew was that the blond was _much_ more fun than she had first thought. They seemed to get on like houses on fire even considering their opposed personalities. She was forever known for her cold uptake on life and short patience, whereas the blond was known for her people skills and cheerful disposition.

"We're like magnets." She had whispered whilst trying to sneak away from Callie whilst she was paying the cab driver, the ortho surgeon seemed a little stressed and was no fun. Their plan to run away immediately failed because they both burst out laughing at her comment.

"Come on you two." Callie for the most part was praying to get in that door, at least then they would stop playing run away from Callie. She was tired and sore from a long day and just wanted her bed. She dragged Christina first into bed telling her if she needed to puke to do it in her bin, there was no way she was cleaning that up for her. Next was Arizona. She turned to look for her and found her on the sofa, laying down with a blanket from in her room and a pillow. Lifting her eyebrow at her she approached her to see if she was awake.

"Um...Arizona, what are you doing?"

"I'm sleeping here tonight, there's no way I'm sleeping with you tonight." Closing her eyes, the end of the conversation apparently.

Callie didn't know what she had done wrong but she wasn't going to argue with the blond about sleeping on the sofa or whether she should come to bed. Maybe Arizona had taken it personally when she told her not to rub the mans head, she didn't know.

-

She sighs as she steps in the shower. She can't believe how amazing that feels on her back and head. When she had woken up on Callie's sofa at first she had been confused, weren't they supposed to have had dinner at hers last night? Then she remembered what had happened last night and how in fact her wonderful night had turned into a nightmare resulting in a massive hangover. She left before Callie woke or Christina, not wanting to deal with that yet. She couldn't believe how drunk she had gotten, she cringed at the image of her trying to dance with a male intern. She had also successfully stolen a bottle of whisky from the bar and was pretty sure it was in Christina's bag. She wasn't sure if Christina even knew it was there.

Despite how horrid her night had been on the Callie front she had made friends with Christina, which was a surprise. They had never really gotten on before and she doubted they ever would have but last night they were inseparable.

Callie though, how could she not have realised that they had a date planned? Why hadn't she questioned how she was drunk, why she was there, why she was wearing the new dress? She didn't notice any of it. She never did. She loved Callie but sometimes she got so preoccupied in her own life she forgot those around her. She knew that and she knew that before they started dating but she was her girlfriend, surely she should think about her sometimes.

She couldn't help the tears that escaped, here in her shower under the safety of the spray she didn't need to be cheery, or happy or a good man in a storm. Here she cried.

-

"Hey, you were gone early this morning. You go home?"

She winced at the loudness of Callie's voice, her head was killing her. This was why she didn't drink so much.

"Yeah, I had to get ready for work and I didn't want to wake you." She kept looking at the chart in front of her, if she looked at Callie she was scared she'd start crying again. She was always emotional after getting drunk.

"No worries, I had to be up early anyway. So, you want to have lunch together later?" Callie was biting her lip, in a manner that always sent her spinning. Callie knew this would get the blond to pay her attention, she knew what the blond loved.

"I can't sorry, I've got a busy day today. Tonight though right?" Arizona asked, looking at her. She was so beautiful and smart and amazing. But she had to be strong, no lunch today because that leads to sneaking off into an on call room and Callie can't have her cake and eat it too. Callie just smiles at Arizona and nods, they have another date tonight. She nearly forgot. "Ok well I'll see you later beautiful." Arizona feels happy, one forgotten date and she had gotten so upset. It's not like Callie had done it before.

-

"You _need_ to go to Arizona's tonight, so why are you asking me to Joe's?" Mark sighs realising once again Callie is running away from his problems. And everything had been going so good as well. Him and Lexie were just talking yesterday about how Arizona had really helped Callie.

"I don't _need_ to do anything. Besides I don't want to have dinner with her tonight, she's acting funny. And also I know you, you need some man time away from playing husband. So tonight, you me and Joe with lots of tequila and watching the football?"

"You don't like football?" Now he knows she's desperate. "What's going on Torres?"

"What do you mean? Nothing, um, nothings going on?" Looking everywhere but at Mark.

"Don't lie to me, now tell me. Arizona not putting out?"

"Mark! No Arizona is fine...more than fine she's great its just something my dad said." Callie pauses, she really hadn't meant to talk about this with Mark, he had a horrible way of making her feel stupid and then she would have to sort it out. He just looks at Callie silently telling her to elaborate. "He told me that Arizona told him...that ...she loves me." Callie cringes as she says it waiting for the plastic surgeon to laugh at her.

"So, what's the problem? You should grow some balls Torres, it's obvious to everyone how you feel about each other. I mean you do love her right?" He says, expecting an easy answer from the brunette. He knew she loved Arizona, so surely she herself realises it. A bitter laugh comes from him as silence is returned. "Oh come on Torres! Even I know you do. And if this is what all this is about, running away from your, dare I say it, feeling then your less of a man than I thought you were. Now I have a surgery to do and then I'm going for a meal with my lovely, beautiful girlfriend and your going to yours."

Laughing as he walks into the OR he realises maybe he was a little harsh on the Ortho doc but she needed to hear it. Even he realises that when HE is the first one to say that she can't run away from her feelings.

-

"What've we got?" Arizona Robbins asked the paramedic as he wheels in the gurney. On it lay a bruised fourteen year old girl whose crying. Her blond hair is stuck to the side of her head from where her blood has caked.

"Approximately fourteen year old female, found in an alley. Looks like she was hit over the head with something and beaten. She won't tell us anything but she is alert."

"Sweetie, I'm Arizona and I'm going to send you for a head scan that'll tell me if there was any damage when you knocked your head ok? When you get back we'll talk ok, just you and me?" She asks looking in the girls eyes and squeezing her hand. She has a bad feeling about this.

-

"Ok so your heads fine. No lasting damage. How are you?" Arizona asked bringing a chair to the side of the girls bed. The girl looked frightened and upset, something terrible happened to her of that Arizona was sure. The girl felt safe around the blond doctor even though she had a bit of a silly name.

"Sore."

"Do you think you could help me fill out this form? And then we'll call your Mom or Dad, yeah?" She nodded back. "OK, so what's your name?"

"Jessica, Jessica Bentley"

"OK Jessica, and how old are you?"

"I'm fourteen."

"Very good, thank you Jessica, We'll call your Mom and Dad now ok? I'll sit with you until then if you'd like?" A nod again. "Ok. So do you remember what happened to you? When they get here we'll give you a further exam, but for now just try and get some rest the medic that brought you in said apart from the head wound and a few bruises you were ok. Do you remember how you got those?" another nod. "Would you mind telling me?"

"I went to a party last night, at a friends house. I didn't really want to go but they said that I'd be an outcast if I didn't and I wanted to fit in. This boy bought me a drink and then the next thing I remember is being outside...outside...in.." She's overwhelmed with tears and Arizona quickly gathers her in her arms and lets her cry, comforting her.

"It's ok Jessica, It's ok."

"No!...No! It isn't it's not ok. He made me, I didn't want to I swear I didn't want to! He made me do it!" Jessica's voice is so full of pain and panic, she's so upset and Arizona feels so inadequate. There's nothing she can do to make that better, nothing.

After ten minutes or so Jessica has cried herself to sleep and she manages to get away. She orders a full blood work and a rape kit, she also phones the police. Her bad day just got so much worse.

-

As expected the date rape drug was found in the girls system, luckily there was no lasting damage and apart from being emotionally damaged there was no further medical reason for her to be there. Jessica had wanted to go home so she was discharged. Arizona hoped she would be ok; it was a very difficult thing to overcome. Her shift was over and she just really wanted to sink into her sofa with Callie and watch an old movie with ice cream and a bottle of wine.


	3. Chapter 3

Callie knew what she was doing, she was very well aware of how she was pulling away from Arizona. But she wasn't ready for I love you's and flowers and happily ever afters. How did she know if Arizona was the one? The girl for her? It wasn't long ago she wasn't even into women and now she's a breath away from having to say I love you to one. That's why instead of heading over to Arizona's for the night she's sat her at Joe's drinking Tequila alone.

She knows its sad and pathetic but she can't bring herself to go over there and she doesn't even think Arizona will mind. OK, she knows that's a lie. Arizona will most definitely mind, she'll probably mind a lot seeing as it was only a few hours ago they had reiterated their plans. It's too late now though, she's already been here for an hour and fifteen minutes.

She takes out her cell hoping to smooth this over.

-

Instead of her night on her sofa with Callie she's once again faced with a full bottle of wine and alone. Callie had stood her up and here she was thinking last night was a fluke. They were meant to be in a relationship, when she had a crappy day, when she was battling memories from years before she needed her girlfriend to be there, she needed her girlfriend not to add to the drama but to be there for her. She needed her to curl up on the sofa with her and tell her its all going to be ok. Otherwise why have a girlfriend at all?

She cared deeply about Callie but it was becoming more and more obvious to her that Callie obviously didn't feel the same or was incapable of having a working adult relationship. She's limited herself to just one glass of wine tonight, she can't turn up at work hung over again, not with the merger going on and the possibility of more job cuts. Her cell starts ringing from its perch next to her and she's half surprised that Callie's bothered to call her this time. Smile once again in place.

"Hey Calliope, how are you?" Cheerful without a hint of the upset she's feeling.

"Hey, look Arizona I'm swamped here at work and I'd really love to come see you tonight but I think it'll be hours before I've finished. Rain check?" The lie she's told almost didn't sting, that is if she hadn't already called the hospital to talk to Callie and the intern she had gotten through to had told her Dr Torres had left already. She laughs, and it comes out more bitter than she had hoped.

"Sure." She clears her throat, the saltiness of her tears hitting her lips distracting her. Callie's sigh of relief is heard down the phone.

"Thanks, that's great you have no _idea_ how swamped I am. Even with all these interns there is still so-"

"Super, my day was super. I have to go now. See you tomorrow at work." Then she hangs up. Her lips tasting of salt, her cheeks wet with tears and her eyes stinging with unshed ones she curls up under a blanket on the sofa alone.

-

Callie looks at her phone with a frown. The answering dial tone assures her she didn't just imagine that, Arizona cut her off. She had been trying to tell her girlfriend about her day and she wasn't interested. So much for I love you's.

-

The next time Callie see's Arizona they're both at an event the hospital is having. It's in a hotel ballroom, lots of big shot doctors and heads of boards and what nots. It seems for the night the Chief has chosen two attending's to be his trophies, apparently they had been doing a fantastic job. That's why she hadn't seen Arizona yet, apart from afar Arizona Robbins and Owen Hunt were his trophies. It seems that the merger is getting to the chief no one really knows why he's trying so hard to show he's not too old to have his job, they know he's great but the harder he tries the worse things get. Tonight for example is an attempt to show off the great attendings they have working at the hospital. It seems like a waste of time to her, they could be saving lives instead of sipping champagne. Expensive champagne that the hospital pays for.

"She's pretty isn't she." An unfamiliar voice says behind her. She finds herself side by side with a stranger who is openly admiring her girlfriend. She already hates him.

"Yeah she is. Do you know Arizona?"

"Oh yes, sorry, Austin Walker. You're Arizona's girlfriend right Callie I think I was told right?" If she wasn't hating him right now she would find him smile endearing and not to mention hot.

"Yes. So you know Arizona?"

"Yeah, we, um, dated in college. Not for very long though, I assure you my not being a woman thing turned out to be a problem." That smile again. Callie didn't know how to feel shocked was a good one, upset another. Arizona had dated a man, how many men had she dated? How come she was learning about this from a stranger, let alone an ex of hers.

"Excuse me a minute would you?" She asked with a smile on her face that could melt butter. Approaching Arizona she realises the Chief is probably going to kill her for this because she is in the middle of what looks like a boring conversation with what looks like an important man but she interrupts anyway, apologising for the inconvenience and making up a story about a patient that needs Arizona's opinion.

"Calliope, which patient? It's not Jessica is it?"

"No Arizona, I made that up."

"You...made that up? Calliope why would you make that up? I was really worried for a moment there, christ."

"No don't Calliope me. I just had an interesting conversation." Lifting her eyebrow up at Arizona she expects a guilty look, a look of worry something all she gets back though is a raised eyebrow in return. "With an ex of yours, Austin?"

"Austin's here?" Arizona asks with a smile, she hadn't spotted him. Was he maybe avoiding her? She hoped not, he was one of her closest friends.

"So not the point." Callie mutters, she can't believe out of all the things where he is bothers Arizona the most. "You dated him, you dated a man."

"Only the one but yeah for two months. It didn't work out, he wasn't a girl." Shrugging her shoulder, "why is this such a big deal anyway?"

"Because!" The weird looks in their direction as well as a frown from the chief tell her she's talking too loudly, grabbing the blond by the elbow she leads her outside onto the patio. "because Arizona you told me you hadn't dated _**any**_ guys and that's why your parents weren't surprised when you came out. Now your telling me you have. How am I supposed to trust what you say? How am I supposed to know that?"

"Because I'm your girlfriend."

"Are you? I don't think that's a good idea anymore." The silence after that statement physically hurts Arizona. Callie herself can't believe what she just uttered, she hadn't intended to break up with the blond but it had just slipped out and there was no going back she could tell by the look of devastation on the blonds face. "Ari-"

"We have trust issues now? My _**girlfriend**_ not showing up to any of our dates is an issue. My _**girlfriend lying**_ to me about it is another one. My girlfriend who by the way hasn't spoken to me properly in two weeks, and still introduces me as her friend from work whenever we run into anyone is still a huge issue. And what gets me the most is you don't even realise your doing it. None of it, or if you do you just really don't care at all." She has tears itching to be released but she won't let them, she can't, not yet. "So yes we have issues Calliope, we have lots of issues but me missing out one small detail isn't one of them, at least not an important one. And if you _cared at _all about me, about us you would be able to see past that. It wouldn't even be an issue." She shoves her glass of champagne into Callie's hand and storms off through the glass doors.


	4. Chapter 4

She couldn't believe how devastated she felt, there had been no warning, no limbo just the end. It was over, her and Callie done. She just had to get out of there, her chest was feeling like it was going to burst . She couldn't break down here, not with everyone watching her and examining her. The chief had put her and Hunt on a pedestal, trying to make it seem like the hospital wasn't sinking and crashing before his eyes all because he was afraid of his own mortality.

"Hey Ari! How are you? I haven't seen you in years? You work here now?" Austin, beautiful Austin that had always tried his best to be what she needed. She was there for her in college through all of it, all her ups and downs. They had only dated for three weeks before she realised she was just a mess because of what had happened to her and that dragging him along with her wasn't the way to fix anything. She had known him since she was twelve years old, he was the first person she had told she liked women and he had always been so in love with her anyway. Always waiting for his chance, and she had given it to him but like they both had known it wasn't ever going to work.

"Austin." She hugs him, something to distract her from her mess of a relationship with Callie. It had had so much promise and now it seemed like a disaster. She sees Callie talking to Mark over Austin's shoulder and there are a few glares your way too. '_great_'. She pulls away from him, he blocks her view of the scolding faces. "I'm great, how are you? I hear from my mother that your now chief in a hospital in New York. Congratulations."

"Yeah, last year now. It seems like a dream I mean I never expected to become Chief I was happy doing general surgery. So you and the brunette? She's hot." He laughs like he used to, he hasn't changed a bit and Arizona can't help but be envious of him because she has changed. She's changed so much from the twelve year old little girl that met him at school because someone was calling him names and she didn't think it was fair or right so she went and punched the other boy like her daddy had taught her to.

"That she is." She can't bring herself to tell him they've just broken up, that its all over. She just can't because she knows that his sympathy will make her breakdown. "What about you? Anyone special?"

"I'm married, yeah also last year. It seemed to be my lucky year last year. We're expecting, here look." He rummages through his pocket and produces his wallet, inside is a picture of presumably his wife and a scan of their baby. A little girl from the looks of it, she doesn't say anything in case he doesn't want to know. What surprises her the most is the picture of her in his wallet, they hadn't really been that close since college, he didn't say it but she had broken his heart. She had wished that she could have been happy being with him but that wasn't who she was and he knew it.

"Wow, that's wonderful Austin. So how long are you in town for?" She can't help but wonder if they'll be able to catch up some more. It would be wonderful, no matter what Callie would think. Arizona reminds herself she no longer has to think about what Callie thinks. It nearly brings the tears out again but she can't not here.

"Just tonight I'm afraid, the babies due next week. You should come visit soon though I'd love for you to meet my wife. I still ring your mother you know she keeps me updated with your happenings it seems your getting ready to settle here then. She the one?" Arizona feels panicked and nauseous she has to get away from Austin and his conversation, he means well but she needs to either cry or get really drunk. Making a hurried excuse she almost runs off, and into a stressed looking Mark.

Mark can't understand half of what Callie was muttering about to him but she was upset and from what he understood they had broken up because of an ex of Arizona's or something. He sighed looking down at the shorted blond why did people keep playing with his friends heart.

"Arizona, look I'm not sure exactly what happened between the two of you nor do I want to know. Just fix it. She trusted you." The glare Arizona sends up to him makes him almost waver, but he hasn't wavered for any woman but Lexie and he isn't going to start now.

"I don't want to hear it Sloane about how I'm the bad guy. I didn't lie to her and she won't let me explain."

"Talk to her Dr Robbins, make it better for her." With that he leaves her standing there in the middle of the hall, people all around her oblivious to the pain she's in right now. She's never felt so alone.

"Who will make it better for me?" She whispers but no one hears her.

-

Christina is angry once again at her boyfriend Owen Hunt. He always seems so busy, too busy for her and their relationship. She's not normally this needy in a relationship, or insecure but they haven't had a proper date in twelve days. She knows because she's been counting. So tonight she is here with her whisky and possibly tequila and she's going to enjoy herself. Meredith has gone off with Derek so she is drinking alone. Everyone seems loved up, apart from Karev but they've never really been that close and he seems intent to drink by himself.

"Urgh I'll have one of those." The bubbly blond that's not so bubbly right now says taking the seat next to Christina and pointing at the whisky. She's surprised not to see the smile on her face, that smile in infuriatingly resilient and always seems present.

"What ticked you off? You know I came here tonight on a promise, a promise from my boyfriend that we would spend the night together laughing at all the self important jerks that come here, but no. No tonight he has to be the chiefs trophy, only he didn't ditch that role like you . You Arizona...you have class." And damn that smile is back. Christina pouts. She knows its very unlike herself but her and the blond mesh when drunk, and she is definitely drunk right now.

"I do believe you are drunk Dr Yang, but that's ok you can be my drinking buddy. Tonight is awful and I want it to be nothing more than a distant, very distant memory." Lifting her glass she makes a toast. "To being fantastically single." Christina watches in amusement as Arizona tries not to spit the whisky back out. Until it clicks what she just toasted to.

"WHAT!?!?" Christina realises instantly how loud that came out when most people turn to look at them, she seems to shrink into her seat even more if that's possible. "You broke up? Wow and I thought my night was bad. Keep the whiskies coming."

-

Somehow once again even having the most horrific night in history she manages to end up home giggling with Christina. They've been making fun of their supposed loved ones for the remainder of the night whilst doing shots of whisky and tequila. After chucking Christina a pillow for the guest room she climbs into her bed and the frustration and pain that she had kept at bay all evening comes out in gut wrenching sobs.

It isn't long before Christina tumbles into her room and surprisingly into her bed and she holds the blond mess tightly to her until she calms down and falls asleep. Christina looks down at the sleeping PEDs surgeon and feels sorry for her, whatever Callie had said to her really hurt her she had never seen the blond so upset. That's her last thought before she too falls asleep.

-

Callie can't believe they had broken up, she hadn't meant to. She was only ever meant to ask the blond about Austin not cause such an argument. The words she had uttered had been out of spite and fear of getting hurt, she had never meant for them to signal the end of them. After talking to Mark for an hour or so after the party he had convinced her to go to Arizona's apartment to make things better.

The door was open which surprised her, Arizona was normally so careful with that. She was worried now, what if something had happened to her before she could make it all better? Creeping into the apartment nothing looked out of place, it all looked just how she kept it. She crept through the living room and down the hall towards Arizona's bedroom. She had to make sure she was ok, maybe something had been stolen. She pushed open the door and what she saw made any thoughts of reconciliation and apologies escape her mind. She was devastated not even twenty four hours after breaking up with her Arizona had found someone else to keep her warm at night. She had slept with someone else. She ran out of the apartment before she could wake them up.


	5. Chapter 5

"What's going on? How is she?" Arizona asked in a rush, she had answered her pager at her apartment and rushed there in record time. Jessica, the fourteen year old girl that had been date raped was back in the hospital.

"Attempted suicide, we managed to stabilise her but she's going to need surgery soon." The intern that she had tried to dance with at Joe's that she still didn't know the name of answered her. "She's also got a broken femur, we've paged Dr Torres."

"Good, let's get her prepped for surgery in ten minutes." Outside she looks like she normally does, cool and confident but inside she is terrified. Terrified of working with Callie on this case, terrified of what might be said between them but most of all she is terrified for the girl in the hospital bed.

-

Callie's head is killing her, after discovering what she had at the blonds apartment she had gone to Joe's to top up her tipsy state. She regretted this now, being called into work at six any day was harsh but today it was pure torture. Also she had just found out she would be working with the cause of her drunken state - one Arizona Robbins. It was a PEDs case, a fourteen year girl that had a broken femur and had also tried to kill herself. It always made Callie sad on cases like today, the emotional pain this young girl must have been going through must have been excruciating for her to try and end her life. She couldn't imagine how she would feel if what had happened to the young girl had happened to her and she was more than twice her age. That thought made her feel old.

"Ok I'm here, I'm awake and I'm ready to rock and roll." Callie called out as she breezed into the OR room, she wasn't about to let the blond PEDs surgeon that she had been hurt by yesterdays events. She wasn't going to be open for even more hurt, she wasn't going to let this shave any more inches off of her height. She would walk tall and she would walk proud. "How bad is it?" addressing the chief who stood in his scrubs to the side just watching everything play out. He didn't look happy.

"Bad Torres, really bad. We've already been here an hour and Robbins hasn't been able to stop the bleeding or close her up. I tried myself but I couldn't either. Also her leg, there is some internal bleeding but nothing compared to her arms. God, that girl...she's completely cut herself open." Being the Chief of a hospital for so long he has seen this many times, too many.

"Ok, let's go people I need a scalpel."

-

"Shit swabs, please." That's the most she's heard from Arizona since she entered the OR room ten minutes ago, she hadn't even acknowledged her presence. It stung a bit but Callie didn't take it personally because she looked so concentrated on her task. The wrists of the patient looked not much more than mangled flesh. "Ok I've stopped the bleeding and patched up the blood vessels. I'm going to close her up and then I'll be able to help you Dr Torres."

"Oh don't rush on my account I'll manage just fine on my own." Glancing at Arizona from the corner of her eye she continues. "I always do." Even through the fabric covering of the mask on her face Callie can see Arizona's jaw twitching. Arizona herself is trying hard not to react or let the Ortho surgeon know she had caught the slight dig that had been placed in her words. Callie had a few scenarios working through her mind, not one of them made her expect the blonds' reaction. The clang of the scalpel hitting the floor reverberated throughout the room and the ominous silence that ensued was uncomfortable until Arizona broke it with an almost animalistic snarl.

"God damn it Callie! Can you, for once, just act professionally? You may have a problem with me but this patient..." She seems to be struggling with her words, Arizona realises she really needs to gain control of the situation she's getting too emotional. "I need you to just do your job and forget your personal problems with me. You didn't want to talk last night, I _**can't**_ talk now." Callie can't help but think that, even though they're horribly broken at the moment, her blue eyes are just so gorgeous. She nods feeling smaller than she did just a few moments ago.

-

Running down the corridors, ignoring all the confused glances and stares thrown her way, she holds in her tears. Arizona can't help but observe that lately she's been doing that too much, nearly breaking down in front of everyone. Emotional outbursts she was known for but crying in front of them was another thing entirely.

_'Tears show them your scared kid, you're not scared of anything are you?'_

Her fathers' words echoing through her clouded mind. If he could see her now she was sure he would be disappointed, so disappointed she was a mess. She hadn't seen her father since last Christmas, nearly a year. He was a great father but he treated her as if she was his son not a daughter. Not that he wanted her to be a boy, no, but he was an army man through and through and he knew how to approach situations better from the male perspective.

The nearness of this situation was getting to her, she understood this girl all too well. She had been this girl.

-

After the surgery was done Arizona nearly ran out of the room, Callie shook her head at her. She couldn't believe how quickly things had changed between them, one minute they were all good amazing even and now they were broken. Just broken.

It had taken her some time but after enquiring with some nurses and staff members she found Arizona up on the roof. She was just standing there staring at the world below, she wasn't crying or anything she didn't look overly upset but she looked surreal. The woman staring at the world below didn't look like the cheery PEDs surgeon she had fallen in love with. She can admit that to herself now, she can't help chuckle at the irony of it. For weeks she had struggled to admit that to herself and now that they had broken up it came easily to her. There was a need in her to comfort the blond, but her pride wouldn't let her. She had broken her heart, she had let someone in and her heart had once again got damaged.

"What was that in there? I don't appreciate being spoken to like that in front of our colleagues. You talk about professionalism and then you do that?" There's an edge to her voice that she hadn't meant to be there, but the image of Arizona and someone else in bed together from the night before is flashing before her eyes and she can't help but feel a bitter rage.

"Don't." It seems that's going to be the only response she's getting. It infuriates her beyond belief, she has the audacity to stand there and ignore her.

"Look I get it ok. You feel hard done by or something and I'm sure to you _I'm_ the bad guy, but you lied to me Arizona." The silence is killing her. "You lied."

"Shut your mouth. I've had it with you, you broke up with me! Ok Callie? You wouldn't even listen to me, you-" the emotion in her voice makes her pause, she hadn't been able to get to grips with her emotion before Callie stormed onto the roof behind her. "_**You**_ were the one that jumped to assumptions just like you always do, I love you Callie and I know it's hard for you and you've had your heart broken before but so have I and I was trying really hard not to be hurt when you needed space and I was patient and I was understanding. You couldn't give that to me last night but I _**need**_ you to be able to do that now. I need space, I need understanding and I need patience."

The raw emotion and the unshed tears in her eyes pause Callie from making a response. She's absolutely blown away by the blonds' emotional statement. She can't help but to nod and she's a little dumbfounded when Arizona just nods her thanks and lifts her arm burrowing herself deep into her side as if nothing had changed between them. She can't help but feel extremely overjoyed to be holding her close.


	6. Chapter 6

Ever since that day on the roof top Arizona had been avoiding Callie, she was a little embarrassed. She hadn't meant to seek comfort from her but she couldn't help herself. Callie was the one person since joining the team at Seattle Grace that she had gained any comfort from. After staying wrapped in Callie's arms for ten minutes she excused herself and left without answering Callie's yells after her. If her father had seen her then he would have been so disappointed.

Callie herself was even more so confused by the blond PEDs surgeon's behaviour. Was she not interested in saving their relationship? Surely if she wanted to work it out she wouldn't be avoiding her, how could they sort anything out if they weren't speaking. She was also confused about what had taken place on the roof top. Never had she seen Arizona so upset before and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't get her to tell her what was wrong. They had sat there in silence, and afterwards the blond wouldn't even look at her. She had run away from her ignoring anything she had said to her. Callie felt a little cheated, she had gone up on the roof with every intention of getting the answers she had wanted. About Austin, about the body in Arizona's bed last night and about all the other luggage that seems to have attached itself to their relationship when she wasn't paying enough attention.

-

Arizona looked in on the girl laying in the white hospital bed lost deep in thought. She felt so sorry for her, having to go through that at all let alone such a young age. The girl, Jessica, was still on the ward until her psych evaluation was finished later that afternoon. She had come in from her attempted suicide nearly a week ago now. She needed support right now, it was difficult, her mother had died when she was a baby and her father hadn't been to see her since she had been admitted last week. He sat in the waiting room with his head in his hands just staring at the carpet. Arizona knew that it was hard for him to see his little girl like this but something needed to be done. He needed to be there for Jessica, at the moment every time she entered her room the first thing she said was asking where her father was.

"Hey, Louisa have you seen Jessica's father? She keeps asking after him." Turning to one of the nurses filling out her paperwork at the station. Arizona sighed in frustration when she got a negative response, no one had seen him since she had been re admitted.

-

"I thought for sure you wouldn't show today after what happened at the party. How you holding up? I hope it wasn't my fault I was only joking around. I can be such an ass, I'm so -"

"Seriously Austin, it's not your fault. Really. I'm fine. Trusting me is her issue not mine I haven't done anything untrustworthy, I was open and honest and when things got tough her first reaction was to break it off. It's not your fault, if it's anyone's its probably mine, I should have seen this coming." Arizona sighed, she had a headache coming but she hadn't wanted to cancel her lunch with Austin he was only in town for the day, he had had an early morning business meeting in Seattle and had been really eager to see how she was. They were still best friends even with all this time apart and the distance between them. For years and years he had been the one to know her the best, even better than her own family. He hadn't minded if she weakened herself with silly emotions that had no merit, he didn't mind if she cried now and again. Arizona Robbins had her best friend back and just because it had inadvertently caused her to lose her relationship with the raven haired goddess she wasn't about to deny him the simple pleasantries of lunch in _the oh so lovely_ hospital cafeteria. She had to be near the hospital encase one of her patients needed her.

"Ari you can't think like that. It wasn't your fault. If her first instinct was to run from you and what you had then isn't it better it's over now before you commit yourself even more to this woman. So what you ran into an ex, an ex of the wrong gender even, and that causes her to dump you?!? You can't serio-"

"Don't! Don't bad mouth her to me Austin, you don't even know her. You don't know what she's overcome, what she's been through-" She hadn't meant to snap at him but Callie was someone she still loved and just because at the moment she was a complete ass to her and they weren't even speaking didn't mean she wanted other people to talk about her like that. Callie was a lovely person, she knew that but maybe she had to come to the realization that they weren't meant to be. There had been signs, there had _been huge_ signs that Callie wasn't happy in their relationship. So Arizona hadn't been on the same page, instead of toning it up and declaring loves maybe she should have been focusing on how happy they had been before worrying about who said what. At the end of the day Arizona knew they both could have done things differently.

"And I know what **you've** been through and that's why I'm worried about you!" During the discussion they both hadn't noticed that their voices had risen, not loud enough so people could hear what was being said but loud enough that they knew the two were arguing. Arizona hung her head a little and huffed a deep sigh, no matter how hard she tried she couldn't keep off of the hospitals huge gossip radar. Since the hospital party there had been many glances and whispers sent her way from the nurses and the residents. She had even seen Miranda Bailey and the chief looking at her with calculating looks of curiosity. Everyone seemed to know something was up with the two surgeons that had recently split and seeing as she wasn't talking about it and apparently neither was Callie no-one was sure what had taken place between the two of them. "Arizona," Austin continued in a hushed tone, "After everything you went through in college and everything you overcame, I can't just let you blame yourself for this. You didn't do anything wrong. God, it's Cindy Mercer all over again." They both chuckled at the reference to an old flame of hers during college, during one of the worst moments of her life her girlfriend had thought she was cheating on her and had dumped her rather embarrassingly and publicly in the middle of graduation. The look on Arizona's fathers face had been quite amusing as Arizona thought back on it. What a way to come out to your father.


	7. Chapter 7

Arizona was so frustrated. Austin had only left the hospital two hours ago and already she had been victim of double the amount of glares than before. It seemed the new theory, if she were to believe what she had heard from one of her scrub nurses, was that she was cheating on Callie with the piece of man candy that had come to visit her at lunch to propose because she was pregnant with his bastard child. Somehow, knowing the way gossip worked around Seattle Grace hospital Arizona didn't find it that hard to imagine people saying that. She had her suspicions however about where the man candy story originated from. She had only heard two people say man candy before, and seeing as Callie was one of them it didn't take her long to find the plastic surgeon looking at her a little guiltily. She was angry with him, while her and Callie had been going out they had been quite friendly, she looked at the plastics surgeon as a close friend, not someone who would be spreading these horrible rumours about her around.

"I'm _pregnant?!"_ In her haste and clouded judgement she had just accidently, and wrongly, announced to ever doctor and nurse in the doctors lounge that she was in fact with child. Arizona rolled her eyes and crossed her arms at the collective wave of murmurs that instantly emerged. She glared at Mark Sloane as all he did was raise his eyebrows in a sort of apologetic way. The look Callie was sending her from her seat next to him on the sofa was one of shock and betrayal. Did everyone seriously think she was a cheating bitch? "I'm NOT pregnant, although that seems to be the latest theory thanks to you. How can you tell people I'm pregnant, and that I was sleeping around?" The look on Mark's face as he stood and quickly shuffled so that the sofa was between the two of him made her realise that she had been edging closer to him in whilst yelling. Mark help up his hands in a surrender, it wasn't doing much to help her mood. She had had enough of the high school drama in the recent weeks, enough of the constant rumours about her personal life. She came here to work primarily, if she made friends great, if she didn't she had her private life outside of the hospital for that.

"I did not tell anyone you were pregnant, that one seems to have just made itself. I wouldn't take it as an insult, no one is saying your fat, or that your gaining weight..." He looks at Arizona and can immediately tell he's saying all the wrong things, he glances at Callie who looks slightly uncomfortable that Arizona is in such close vicinity of her after a week of no contact. "Not that it would be a problem if you were gaining weight, I mean, you really can't tell one way or the other. And anyway don't they say pregnant women are glowy like...someone thinks your glowing so really it's a compliment. Help me please." He looked into the eyes of the blond surgeon who was still making her way around the sofa, he quickly adjusted his position so there were at least two meters of space between them at all times. "Your obviously not pregnant, and I may have mentioned seeing you with a piece of meat, a male piece of meat at the party. It was the nurses fault...they...they're like rapid dogs, they drove it out of me." Seeing her opportunity Arizona leaps the rest of the distance between them and grabs his ear twisting it until he's squealing. "Ow! Ow! Ow! Please save me someone, she's flipped." Arizona looks around and notices the crowd they've gained and gives Sloane's ear one last tug before letting it go.

"I am not pregnant and I did not cheat. Our private lives are exactly that - private." She sighed and headed back to her ward. She sighed when she turned the corner and was alone, she had seen Callie's face when she had come in accidently making it seem like she was announcing her with child status, she had thought it was true. She really did have no trust in her. She really did think she would cheat on her.

-

Callie had found the whole scene in the doctors' lounge to be highly amusing. It wasn't often someone had a go at Mark Sloane, all the nurses around the hospital and many of the doctors thought he was some kind of god. Many of the male members of staff were too afraid to speak up against him because of his reputation with the ladies. So it had been very satisfying to see Arizona turn him into a stuttering mumbling wreck. He hadn't been able to dig himself out of that hole, and she was in no position to help him. She knew that by not acknowledging the gossip about Arizona that she was adding to it, many had assumed after seeing her crying at the party that it had been due to the blonds fault. She realized she had over reacted, and she would do anything to take it back but she knew she couldn't because the blond had confirmed her suspicions just hours later. Arizona had brought the first person she could find and shared her bed with them, she hadn't given Callie a second thought. It hurt knowing she was so much more invested in their relationship than Arizona, she still couldn't imagine being with anyone else other than the PEDs surgeon.

"You paged me?" She asked Arizona as she caught sight of her at the nurses station in the PEDs ward. She glanced up from her paperwork but otherwise looked unaffected by her presence.

"Yeah, I need a consult, room 5 both legs are broken. If you go in I'll be right there in a moment Dr Torres."

-

"How dare you move my patient and send him for surgery without telling me, damn it Callie, just because we have personal problems doesn't mean you can throw away the protocols. They're there for a reason!" Arizona was furious, how could she do this. She had taken her patient out of her ward without her say so, Callie had performed a surgery on him without knowing his full history. Anything could have happened he could have died on the table, before he even made it onto the table, anything. Not wanting to be the centre of the gossip mill once again Arizona grabbed the Ortho surgeon and pulled her into an empty room.

"How dare I? I'm a surgeon at this hospital as well, I gave him a consult and then checked with the resident on his case to see if there was anything I needed to know. It all worked out, he's fine and his legs are mended. I don't see the problem, _Dr Robbins._" Callie shoved her hands into her pockets, not knowing what to do with them. She was angry, the blond woman in front of her obviously thinking she was risk her patients care just because of what was happening between them. Arizona sighed, when she had seen the surgery up on the board and the empty room she had panicked, in her last hospital due to miscommunication between attendings' she had lost two patients, all because the other doctor had a god complex.

"Next time, could you please just let me know what's going on with my patient?" Arizona sighed and made her way to leave but found Callie stood in her way.

"Seriously and I'm the one with the trust issues in this relationship. Arizona you don't even trust me to do my job properly let alone act properly in our relationship. I never lied to you about anything, I told you up front I was hurt in the past, I told you up front my relationships are always a disaster and you still wanted to date me so how could you lie about it to me?" Callie was shaking with anger, she couldn't believe how much she had trusted the blond surgeon, how much their relationship had meant to her until it was gone. Yes she knew she had also been at fault, she had been pulling away for the past few weeks but she was scared, and she just needed time. Arizona on the other hand was past making excuses for their mistakes, past reliving every moment in their relationship to see where it went wrong. She knew she wasn't perfect, but she wasn't pushing her issues onto Callie.

"Lie to you? Lie to you about what Callie? About Austin. I never said I hadn't dated a man before, in fact the only time I remember talking about past relationships is when we were talking about coming out to our parents. I never brought a guy home, I dated Austin all of three weeks before I broke it off. I broke his heart because I just wasn't into men. I was in a bad place, I had just been dumped by my girlfriend and I knew he loved me."

"So it's a pattern is it? Rushing into bed with someone after a break up. I knew you liked to date but I didn't realise I was dating a whore. Is that what you do? Lure people into bed with you, fuck them and then keep them around for a while if they're a good lay? God you're more of a whore than Mark, at least he's honest about what he wants from you. You-"

"Shut up." Arizona's whisper cuts through what she was saying. Arizona can't make eye contact with Callie at the moment; instead she stares at the floor. The tears stinging her eyes being held back with just the small amount of will power left in her. "I thought..." She has to pause to keep her voice from breaking. Thankfully Callie is keeping quiet. Callie realises she said terrible things, she can see the hurt on the blonds face she just got so angry. A month ago they were so happy, a month ago they were perfect. "I thought, even though we had broken up, even though you had broken us that we could be ok, that...that maybe we could get passed it. But you...you just ruined that. I don't know where you got the idea from that I rushed into bed with someone after you, but I didn't." This time when she leaves Callie doesn't stop her.


	8. Chapter 8

"Dr Robbins! Come here! Dr Robbins I need a word with you!" This is not what Arizona needs right now, It's Mr Bentley, Jessica's Father. He had been absent from the ward all week and right now, seconds after her confrontation with Callie this is not what she needed.

"How can I help?"

"I want Jessica discharged today, right now. You'll all be filling her head with non-sense; she should be upset if she hadn't gone to that party nothing would have happened to her. It's you isn't it, you've been the one telling her she has nothing to be sorry for! How dare you? She's my daughter, she's-"

"Mr Bentley, yes she is your daughter. You can bring her up anyway you want but as long as she is in this hospital she is my patient and I shall discharge her when I feel its medically relevant not because it's what you want. Now I understand you're angry and that you're upset, but do _not_ take that out on Jessica. She needs you, she needs you to be strong." She sighs, this day has been so long and it's not even over. She can see the nurses watching the exchange between them, she can see Callie strolling down the hall towards them to see what the commotion is. Arizona feels like she is stuck in a web of rumours and lies and she can't get out. "And for your information your daughter has nothing to be sorry for, what kid doesn't go out to a party at her age. Who doesn't want to have a good time? She didn't ask to be raped. It's not her fault and if you're going to go in there and blame her, make her feel ashamed then I suggest you don't go anywhere near her hospital room because if I for one minute think your making this harder for her I'll be ringing social services before you can stutter out an excuse." She stomps of out of the PEDs ward, usually it's her safe haven but everyone is watching her for some clue into the Callie and Arizona mystery. She knows she could be in trouble with the Chief for threatening the call social services on that man but she doesn't care. She has one more surgery to do and then her shift ends.

-

It's late and Callie is sat at Joe's on her fourth tequila by the time she is joined by Christina. She can't believe how out of control her relationship with Arizona has ended up, and it's all her fault. She saw the devastation on the woman's face as she hurled insult after insult at her, but Arizona was the better person; Arizona didn't once insult her or call her names.

"What do you want?" She groans at her flatmate, they can get along most of the time but they're not exactly the closest of friends and all Callie wants to do right now is get drunk in silence.

"I heard you had a fault with McPerky, and that you think she slept with someone else the night you broke up with her."

"How did you k-"

"Mcsteamy - but don't blame him I had to pull it out of him. Anyway that's not my point, I'm going to tell you something and then I'm going to leave you to wallow in self pity. I would offer to join you but...then you'll want to talk about your feelings blah blah blah." Callie raises an eyebrow at her and downs another shot of tequila, she can hardly feel it burn anymore. "She didn't sleep with anyone else, I stayed over and held her as she cried then we both fell asleep. So whatever you thought you saw you didn't because I stayed with her all night. I know I'm a fantastic person, I'm going to heaven. Bye." With that Christina, true to her word, left Callie to it and headed out of the bar.

Callie felt numb, she couldn't process what the cardio resident had said to her, what it meant for her. It meant she was wrong, so, so, so terribly wrong. That she had called the woman she loved a whore for no good reason. That she had irreversibly destroyed their relationship, all because she was afraid of what being in love with her meant. Callie Torres sat in Joe's drinking shot after shot for the rest of the night, in self pity just like Christina had predicted. The question running through her mind was how was she ever going to make this right?

-

Arizona had just got out of a meeting with the Chief, not a meeting more like a lecture and a stern warning. Like she had anticipated Mr Bentley had complained about the way she had spoken to him yesterday and luckily the Chief had managed to talk him out of suing her, although what judge would ever side with him over her she didn't know. It took all her will power not to yell at the Chief and tell him exactly what she thought of Mr Bentley, and now she had to go apologise to him. Just the thought of his smug grin was enough to make her cringe.

She hadn't seen Callie since yesterday when she had called her a whore, she couldn't believe what she was hearing at the time. Calliope, her sweet lovely Calliope, had stood in front of her calling her a whore. Even until then she had been holding onto small tethers of hope that they could reconcile, that their love would overcome this..._this_ pettiness. But after that, after hearing what the brunette thought of her she couldn't see a way back.

"Arizona! Arizona wait for me please. Arizona! Hold the doors." Out of instinct more than anything she held her arm out stopping the elevator doors from closing and leaving without the flustered looking Latina. It wasn't until she was stood next to her in the confined place without any other people that she realised by doing so she had put herself in a very awkward position. "Arizona, please listen to me, you gotta listen I'm so, so sorry for yesterday. All the things I said, I didn't mean them. Well at the time I did but only because I thought you had...and then Christina told me...and now I know that you'd never do that...and I'm so, so sorry. Please baby you have to believe me when I say I'm sorry." Arizona had half expected her to have yelled at her some more, she wasn't expecting an apology. She wasn't prepared for an apology, she didn't know what to say or what to do. She ended up staring at the woman in front of her having no idea how she was meant to feel right now, was she meant to be angry, sympathetic, happy, sad, insulted, loved? She didn't know which way was up or which way was down. She had no great wisdom from her father right now, her mind was drawing a blank. The only thing she could remember at that moment in time was her father telling her to always let them think your on top of the world, that way they wouldn't ever be able to drag you down. She could faintly hear the elevator doors ping open. She stared into the cautious eyes of Callie for a second longer and then started leaving.

"Super." She smiled at her and left her standing there with her mouth open staring after her.

She really wasn't prepared for an apology.

-

"Super! I mean who says that after receiving an apology. I would even think that's weird. Don't you think that's weird?"

"Look girl, you're the one that said it. You're the one that was there. You're the one who, even after my repeating myself that I don't want to hear about your personal life, keeps talking about it. Yes I think it's weird. I think your damn weird but shut up about it and let me do my work in peace." Bailey sighed and gathered her chart and walked away from the perky PEDs surgeon before she chucked them at her. Arizona gaped at Bailey, she knew she could talk for the best of them but she hadn't realized she was annoying the general surgeon so much. She was just so confused by the apology; she didn't know what it meant for them. What she wanted it to mean for them. Was there still the possibility of them?

-

Callie was stumped, after apologising to Arizona she had expected to be slapped, yelled at, wept on, anything other that 'super'. What did that even mean? Was Arizona willing to give them another go? She sighed into the pillow of the bed in the on call room, she was trying to get a nap before her next surgery but she just couldn't get the conversation out of her head. Super. Who says that when someone's just apologised? That isn't even an appropriate response. Callie was now 'super' confused.


	9. Chapter 9

It's been two days since the apology and Arizona is exhausted, she's finding it hard to function. She's had to ask another PEDs surgeon to take her last surgery of her shift because she can't confidently say she'll be all there or that she won't keel over. She hasn't been able to sleep properly since, she's so confused. There hasn't been any communication between the two since that day in the elevator and she's had enough. She's had enough of being confused, she's had enough of not knowing what Callie wants, she's had enough of feeling completely and utterly numb. She made herself numb, after the breakup she made herself not fully feel what it had done to her because then she'd be ok. Then she's make it. Then, she told herself, it didn't matter that her heart was broken. But she had had enough of hiding, of running away from her feelings, she was always optimistic and she was going to be now. She had to be. So tonight she was going to go home, she was going to have something to eat and something to drink and she was going to let herself feel and she was going to make a decision. Whether or not she and Callie had a chance in her mind.

-

Her having a meal and a drink turned out into no food and several, a few too many perhaps, drinks. She was now very, very tipsy. But her mission was accomplished, she let herself feel what the break up had done to her. She opened that proverbial compartment in her mind that was labelled break up, and it hurt. It hurt a lot which led to her drinking. But she had made a decision, she now knew what she was going to do. Whether it was a good idea or not to do it whilst she was drunk was up for debate, one which her mind at the moment was too inebriated to even realise. Arizona grabbed her keys and made her way outside, it was raining as usual in Seattle so she hoped she got a cab soon otherwise she would have to walk and it was quite a long way and it would be more of a stumble.

-

She was going to find her and talk to her right now. Callie was fed up of skating around the issue. Making her way up to the PED ward she had to stop several times to gain courage to continue. When she made it there she nearly sighed with relief when she didn't see the perky PEDs surgeon anywhere. She asked some of the nurses where she was and it turned out she wasn't even in the hospital she had left early because she was so tired. She immediately felt guilty, feeling somehow responsible.

"Hey you're the doctor that fixed my leg aren't you?" A small, young female voice startles her out of her musings. She turns and finds the voice belongs to the girl she operated on the other day with Arizona. Jessica.

"Yes I am, how's it feeling? Better I hope." Entering her room she takes note of the vase full of lilies. She knows instantly who bought them for Jessica, they're Arizona's favourite.

"Yep. Dr Robbins says I can go outside soon with my crutches. It feels like forever ago that I went outside."

"She get you these?"

"Uh huh, because I can't go outside. You know what happened to me don't you?" Callie instantly knows she's talking about her rape, she looks like she isn't really concentrating on their conversation anymore, she's concentrating more on the magazine she's picked up. The look of worry though spreading on her brow lets Callie know she is paying attention.

"Yes. I'm sorry that happened to you."

"It's ok. Well it's not but it's not _your_ fault." She pauses and bites on her lip, she looks like she's debating something. "Do you think it's my fault?"

"Do you?"

"I asked first." For a fourteen year old she sure was lippy, most would be to scared to talk back.

"No I don't think it was your fault at all. You just went to a party like any normal fourteen year old. You don't think it was your fault do you? You shouldn't."

"That's what Dr Robbins said. That I shouldn't be ashamed, and I shouldn't think I'm to blame. My dad though, he blames me. I can see it. Plus I overheard him talking with Dr Robbins. She yelled at him. I never heard anyone yell at my dad before."

"Yeah she's like that."

"I like Dr Robbins. She _understands_." Before Callie can even comprehend that, or ask her about it a nurse comes in to take Jessica for some tests. Something about what she said edges its way into her mind and sticks there, 'she understands'. She wasn't sure she wanted Arizona to be able to understand even if she didn't know what that meant yet.

-

Callie was drained she had had a long day at the hospital and it was now the middle of the night and only now making her way home to her apartment. Christina was still at the hospital so she would have the place to herself, she planned to crash out in front of the television and watched whatever crap was on the first channel she flicked to. Mindless television thought was what exactly she needed right now, she had been thinking too much the last few days. She had apologised, it was now up to Arizona to decide if they had anything left the salvage.

As she got closer to her apartment building she recognised a familiar head of blond hair sat on her door step. Outside. In the freezing cold rain.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? You're going to get pneumonia. Why didn't you let yourself in, you've still got the key I gave you?" Callie quickly shrugged off her coat and wrapped the shivering Arizona in it. She was soaked through and freezing cold, she must have been here for quite a while.

"I...wanted...to....see...you." It's hard for her to understand what Arizona is saying through the chattering of her teeth. "But..I couldn't catch...a cab, so...I walked. I forgot the k..ey." Callie rubs her hands along the blonds arms trying to warm her up, it feels so good to be near to her again after not being near her for weeks, not like this anyway, not without arguing.

"Come on, let's get inside and warm you up." If Arizona had still been drunk she would have made an inappropriate joke at that but the cold and the rain has quickly sobered her up, not enough for her to leave before talking to Callie. It's killing her not being near her and not getting this sorted, Callie had apologised so it was her turn. Her turn to be the grown up and talk to her. It's not until they are sat on the couch with a hot drink and she's changed into some of Callie's pyjama's that she starts to lose her courage. She's not sure she can do this. "How've you been?" Callie's just as nervous and stuck, they both want to talk but neither know how to start. They're at a stalemate, neither knowing the next players move.

"Tired. Upset. Confused." Arizona figures honesty is the only way to have this discussion, otherwise they'll be back to square one and bogged down with lies. "I've been so tired Callie."

"I'm sorry. If I could take it back I would. I've been so stupid. I can't believe I called you a whore." Arizona giggles at the memory, she can't believe it either. Callie looks at the blonde for a sign that her giggle was bitter or sarcastic but all she sees in return is sincerity, she can't believe Arizona can giggle about it.

"No I didn't believe it either. Why did you call me a whore?"

"I'm so sorry, I feel like such an ass, I saw Christina in your bed and I just assumed that, you know." Arizona nods, she can't trust her voice at the moment, she can't shut off the constant stream of hurt filling her up. She's so hurt that Callie thought their relationship meant that little to her. It gets her so frustrated.

"Didn't you know?! Didn't you understand Callie?! I loved you damn it."

"I know ok, I knew that but I freaked and then with Austin I just...I thought that we were going to turn out into a disaster just like with George, with Erica." Callie feels like she's spiralling out of control, 'loved' , past tense. Arizona had used past tense not 'love'.

"I'm not George, and I sure as hell am not Erica. I'm me, I'm Arizona and you should have trusted that. You should have trusted me. You hurt me so much Callie." The blond can't sit still at the moment, too many pent up feelings are warring their way to the surface she needs to pace the front room. "I...God Callie...I thought we were going somewhere and you freaked I get that but you should have talked to me. Why? Why didn't you talk to me?" The tears are running down both their faces now, they both know what this conversation means. They both know this could be it for them, or this could be the moment when it all falls back into place. This is their moment, their break or make moment.

"I was scared. I'm so sorry, I'm sorry. I screwed it all up, I broke us. This is all my fault, if only I wasn't scared of something so silly. My dad told me you loved me, and I freaked I didn't feel like I was ready. But baby, I'm ready. I love you so much Arizona. I love you." Callie's making her way over to Arizona but the blond is shaking her head. Arizona is once again at a loss, she wasn't prepared and she's so confused. She had been prepared for it being over, for walking away and she had no idea if they can come back from this. The silence between them is cutting into Callie's heart. She knows what silence means. She knows what it means for them. It means that they broke, they didn't make it and it was all her fault. She looks at the usually so calm, perky and confident woman before her and realises with a gasp that she broke _her_. She looks so broken, her mascara has run and her cheeks are littered with tears, her usually bright shining eyes are dull and red. She looks so devastated, Callie knows that this is it. "We..." She has to take a deep breath before she can continue. "We can't come back from this can we? There's no going back?" She's crying harder now, when she sees the quick shake of the head from Arizona she's sobbing and her knees give out. Arizona hasn't made eye contact with Callie since her declaration of love. Callie is sobbing into her arms and Arizona is still so confused but Callie is right in her assumption; there's no coming back from this.

Arizona is still so tired and her tears stopped a few minutes ago, she has no tears left in her. She's spent. She makes herself look at the woman crying in front of her. Her heart breaks a little for her. She quickly moves and lifts Callie's head from her folded arms and caresses both her wet cheeks.

"But maybe, maybe we don't have to find a way back. Maybe we can find a way _**forward**_."


	10. Chapter 10

_**HEY thank you all for your reviews and for reading my story. I love to hear what you think..reviews help me write ;) lol. Any critism and ideas are welcome. Is there anything particular you'd like to see?**_

_"But maybe, maybe we don't have to find a way back. Maybe we can find a way __**forward**__."_

Arizona looked deep into Callie's eyes and she saw nothing but love shining back in them and relief. Both of which were mirrored in her own blue orbs. She knew she could never give up on them that easily.

"I love you Calliope." She pressed her lips tightly against the Latina's and relished the familiar feel of them against her own. "God I love you." She gasped as she pulled away. She slid her hands into the beautiful dark hair of her girlfriend and pulled their lips together again, this time flicking her tongue against Callie's bottom lip seeking entrance to her hot, wet mouth. She resists moaning out loud when her tongue met Callie's and they stroked each other in a familiar dance. She had missed this, this closeness to Callie. Kisses with Callie were always so intimate and loving. There were different kinds too: soft and gentle, hard and passionate, quick and messy, slow and sensual. She didn't have a favourite; she loved all of Callie's kisses.

Callie had stopped crying now with each kiss from the blond beauty kneeling with her on the floor all the worries and doubts of their relationship were being erased away. Not forgotten but over powered by her feelings of love and adoration for her. She loved Arizona Robbins and she was now ready to fully admit what that meant for them. They were a proper couple, with declarations of love and the possibilities were endless. With each scorching hot kiss from Arizona she felt excited and eager to find their way forward.

"Bedroom." Arizona muttered between kisses and stood up grabbing onto the sleeves of Callie's shirt pulling her up and all but dragging her to Callie's room. As soon as they reached it she closed the door behind them by pushing Callie hard against it, she held the Latina's hands above her head with her left hand whilst her right moved along her lovers curves. Her mouth leaving a delicious moist trail down Callie's neck as she made her journey towards her breasts. Smirking into Callie's fantastic skin Arizona nipped at the top of her breast before making her way back up to her mouth, enjoying the groan of frustration Callie let out as she claimed her mouth in another mind blowing kiss. Callie loved it when Arizona took control in the bedroom, she didn't often do it probably because Callie loved to be the one in the lead, but it was so hot when she did.

Their tongues massaged one another's and they both moaned at the sensations shooting through them. Arizona had never felt like this with anyone else, sex had always been good but never this good. With Callie it was amazing. She saw stars every time. Callie saw leaves.

That was how they spent the rest of the night. Tangled limbs, groans and moans and more than one or two love bites.

-

When Christina entered the apartment when the sun was just rising she was surprised to see two mugs on the coffee table. Ever since the breakup Callie had moped alone either at Joe's or in her room, so she was confused as to why she would have company now. Creeping towards the her roommates bedroom she stopped to listen at the door, when she heard the familiar voice of Arizona Robbins giggling and whispering to Callie she smirked and flung open the door. Luckily she had been right and they were safely **under** the covers wrapped around one another in a cuddle instead of a heated embrace.

"Hey Lover lets have sex again. It was so mind blowingly awesome last time right Robbins." Both she and Arizona burst out laughing whilst Callie just glared at her and lifted her eyebrow at her girlfriend. After a while of their laughing she groaned and hid her head under the covers.

"Fine, make fun of the emotionally challenged one." comes her muffled voice. Arizona laughs pulling the covers off of her face. Christina is glad to see the smiles on their faces, they are so wide and bright she's getting nauseous just standing in the doorway.

"Aw you weren't emotionally challenged last night. Did you hear Christina? Calliope woves me. She-" The blond PEDs surgeon doesn't get to finish what she was going to say because of the shriek that involuntarily leaves her mouth at the sudden attack of fingers at her sides. Christina sighs and turns and closes the door behind her. She makes her way out of the apartment to head to Owen's. Even she doesn't have the heart to tell them to stop their silliness.

-

"So...what are we going to do today? If I remember correctly, which I so do because I'm awesome, we've both got the day off." It's late already, eleven and they're both still in bed and not dressed. After Christina left their tickle battle turned into something a little bit more...heated. Callie pretended to ponder for a moment before leaving a long and sensual kiss on her lover's lips and hopping out of bed and grabbing her robe.

"You are going to stay right there and do something entirely lazy such as read or go back to sleep or maybe just be mesmerized by the stamina your wonderful girlfriend showed last night. While said wonderful girlfriend goes and makes her even more wonderful, beautiful, awesome girlfriend breakfast in bed." Callie crawls over the covers and pecks Arizona on the nose before running out of the room. Arizona flops onto her back and stretches her arms above her head staring at the ceiling. She can't seem to stop the huge smile that's enveloping her face. After a few minutes away from Callie she already starts to miss her so she jumps off of the bed and grabs the sheet off of the bed and wraps it around herself before heading out into the living room. She wraps her arms around Callie's waist from behind whilst she's making eggs.

"Hey I told you to stay in bed." Callie turns slightly and they stare at each other, their faces only inches apart. Both of them can't stop the silly smiles on their faces, even if they wanted to. Callie pretends to pout for a minute but it doesn't work because as Arizona quickly dips her head into peck her protruding bottom lip her smile once again engulfs her face. She in so unbelievably happy right now. They once again get caught just staring at each other, it's like they're addicts and the other is their drug. It's not until the eggs are burnt that Callie realises she her attention has been stolen by the blond goddess that's covered in only her bed sheet. "God your sexy Ari." She moans out honestly drinking in the sight of her and memorising it forever. If it's possible Arizona's smile gets wider.

"I like that." She gives the cutest giggle and nudges Callie's nose with her own.

"Like what?" Callie looks confused; of course she likes being called sexy. Who doesn't?

"You called me Ari." Callie doesn't understand the significance. She lifts her brow. "You've never called me that before. I'm not sure anyone has. They always shorten my name to Zona if anything. I like it; it's like a special name for me just from you."

"You're adorable." Callie smiles and can't resist stealing another kiss from the blond. "So adorable but you have to get back in bed so I can concentrate on the food and not burn it again. You're so damn distracting...Ari." She winks and slaps Arizona on the bum when she turns and starts to make her way back to the bedroom. She laughs and turns just as she gets to the doorways. Leaning against it, and resting her head against her hand she stares at her girlfriend pottering around the kitchen making them breakfast and muttering in Spanish probably about the burnt eggs. She can't take the massive smile off of her face.

"Hey Calliope." She calls and when Callie turns to her holding a saucepan and a sponge she can't help thinking how adorable she is. "I love you."

She feels pretty close to perfect right now.

-

"That was delicious, god I wish I could cook...you know at all." Arizona loves Callie's cooking; it always tastes so wonderful and leaves her feeling full and warm. She loved everything Callie does.

"Well you don't have to cook, because you'll always have me." Arizona smiles folds herself into Callie's side as they lay back on the bed. Callie runs her fingers through the blond hair sprayed across her chest, they hadn't been this happy even before their breakup. She feels a pang in her chest thinking of those weeks apart. They had been the worst weeks of her life; she had never felt so lost and sad. And although she regrets them so much she's not sure if she would take them back if she could, because here right now with Arizona she feels so complete and she's not scared anymore. She knows what she wants, and she knows that that is Arizona Robbins. The perky and forever optimistic PEDs surgeon that changed her life with one small kiss in a dirty bathroom of a bar.


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you to everyone that reads this fic and especially those who have reviewed :D **

Waking up in Callie's arms was the best feeling in the world. She loved this feeling; Arizona was on the top of the world. The woman she loved was once again in the bed they shared. Callie had asked her to move in permanently in the apartment she shared with Christina. Yang didn't have any problems with the PEDs surgeon moving in, they had found an odd sort of common ground and both enjoyed each other's company especially when alcohol was involved.

It had been a week since Arizona and Callie had sorted out their differences and everything was going smoothly. Arizona felt on top of the world, she and Callie were at their best yet and she could only see the connection between them grow each day. They had sat down a few days after getting back together and talked about what had started the arguments and the break up. Callie had explained how terrified of love she was and how she was over it and Arizona had explained how Austin was her best friend in college and that they had gotten close, as friends, once again the past few weeks.

"Hmm, love you Ari." The dark haired goddess sighed out as she tightened her arms around Arizona's waist. Callie couldn't believe she nearly lost the blond beauty due to her own idiocy. Arizona turned around and faced Callie; she smiled at the sleepy look on her face. Closing the gap between them she pecked her quickly on the lips and then jumped out of her grasp and out of the bed before Callie even realised what was going on. Callie raised an eyebrow at Arizona's playful mood this early in the morning. "Tease."

"That's why you love me Calliope." Arizona smiled and practically skipped to the bathroom to take a shower and get ready for work. Callie groaned and rolled over in bed to catch a few more minutes whilst she waited for Arizona to be done in the bathroom. "I think it would be more environmentally friendly if we were to conserve water!" The blond yelled from the bathroom. Callie was out of bed and in the shower in no time.

-

When Arizona got to work she was surprised to see the fourteen year old patient she had a week ago, Jessica. She had been discharged six days ago and had no reason to be back on the PEDs ward. She was sat next to the nurses' station waiting for her. The nurses told her she had been there for two hours already, refusing to go to wait in the waiting room or her office.

"Jessica? You ok?" She asked frowning in concern walking over to her. When she turned her head up to the blond surgeon Arizona could tell she hadn't been sleeping well or eating well. The young girl shook her head. She was so emotionless and cut off from everything. "You wanted to see me? How about we go grab some breakfast up in the canteen?" Again all she received was a nod in return. "Hey Mary, I'm going to be busy for a while could you ask Duncan to take over my patients for the morning? Thanks." With her morning cleared she headed up to the canteen with Jessica in tow. She had a feeling this was going to be a long morning.

-

"Hey Mary, have you seen Dr Robbins I need her help with something?" Callie had been rushed off her feet all morning everyone seemed to have broken something in the last twenty four hours, she was exhausted already. She wanted to know if her girlfriend was free to go for a quick coffee and a donut.

"Dr Walker is looking after her patients for the morning, Dr Robbins had a visitor I think they headed up to the canteen, that was two hours ago now though." Callie frowned; it wasn't Austin because he was on a business trip abroad. Arizona hadn't mentioned anyone coming to visit. She headed up to the canteen anyway; hopefully she'd get to speak to her for a few minutes. Any interaction with Arizona really would brighten up her day.

-

For the first hour and a half Jessica had only wanted to talk about school, new films and new songs that were out. Arizona had mainly just listened to her and added a few of her own opinions in when needed. She knew the teenager was here for a reason and that she would get round to it when she felt comfortable. Arizona doubted anyone had just talked to and listened to Jessica since the rape.

"You said you understood. You do understand right? I didn't get that wrong did I? You were...you were r...you were too?" The confident teenager that had been telling her all the about the newest trends dissipated right before her eyes and she looked so vulnerable and uncomfortable. Arizona knew different though, Jessica was a strong girl who was dealing incredibly well. The questions though that she was asking her made the blond squirm a little inside, it had been ages since she had had to talk about this. Ages since she had willingly muttered a single word about it. She knew though that this is what Jessica wanted and needed someone to understand. Whilst Jessica had been on the ward she had said a few things to her to let her know she wasn't alone, she wasn't the only one.

"Yeah I was too, a long time ago. Is...Is there anything you want to ask me?" Arizona wanted to get out of there, she wanted someone to page her anything to get her out of talking about this. She knew what Jessica would ask; it was the same every time someone found out. On the one hand she felt trapped and terrified about talking about it, and on the other she wanted to do this for Jessica because Jessica might feel just that little bit better about herself.

"When?"

"When I was in College, a long time ago." The conversation that had flowed so easily just before was now turned into something else. It was all clipped, emotionless statements that neither wanted to ponder on too much.

"What happened?" Arizona gazed across the table at the girl and knew she'd want to know that but was still unprepared for it. She needed to do this though.

"It was in college and I"

-

Callie was stood in line at the canteen waiting to pay for the coffees and soda she had picked up. She could see Jessica and Arizona from where she was stood. It looked like quite an intense conversation. She hoped she wasn't interrupting anything and hoped if she brought drinks that would be overlooked. Arizona was mainly talking now and then they sat in silence for a while. Jessica reached across and squeezed the blond's hand. Callie frowned; she had assumed Arizona had been comforting the teen. It was still silent when she made her way over.

"Hey, Jessica right? How are you?" She smiled and took a seat next to her girlfriend, Jessica sat opposite them. She smiled at Arizona and was rewarded with one back in return. Arizona's smiles really brightened up her day, she felt less exhausted already. There was something off though about Arizona, it was in her eyes and the lazy way she grabbed the coffee she offered. "I got you soda, wasn't sure I should be giving a fourteen year old a caffeine fix."

"Thanks Dr Torres."

"Yeah thank you Callie. Busy day?" Arizona asked taking in her girlfriends features.

"God yes. I'm exhausted already, and it's not even lunch yet. I have another eight hours." She sighed and leant her head on Arizona's shoulder for a moment and pulled a sad face at Jessica who laughed at her. "So what have you two been up to?" Callie looked between whilst blowing on her steaming coffee while the two of them whilst they shared a look.

"Nothing much, Dr Robbins was just telling me about her tattoo." Jessica said and then shrugging innocently.

"You don't have a tattoo." Callie frowned looking at the blond woman beside her.

"Ha-ha! I knew it! You two are totally dating each other! Shame on you not telling me Dr Robbins, I've been fishing for that all morning." And she had Jessica had been dropping Dr Torres into the conversation every now and then, she found it amusing the way the blonds mouth would quirk into a half smile at just her name.

"You're ashamed of me Ari?" Callie made a puppy dog face at the blond. Arizona looked between the two of them and sighed, they were impossible. She could tell Callie was just joking. Arizona was a little worried now that Jessica knew they were dating she would think it possible to continue their conversation about the rape thinking Callie would know, she didn't want Callie to find out like this. She wasn't sure she wanted Callie to ever know.

"You two can't gang up on me that's not fair. You were my patient so you're meant to be on my side, and as my girlfriends so are you." She quickly pecked Callie on the lips seeing the adorable grin on her face.

"Hmmm, I suppose." Callie winked at her. "Well I shall leave you to your chatting while some of us hard working surgeons...work. See you for lunch?" Arizona nodded at her and smiled her usual smile at her. She shook off her earlier worry, Arizona seemed fine. As she was walking away though that illusion shattered at hearing Jessica's whispered words.

"She doesn't know does she?" Callie didn't need to turn around to see Arizona's shake of the head. Callie didn't quite know what it was that she didn't know, but she felt oddly sad. Not for herself, but for Arizona because if this was about Arizona 'understanding' Jessica she had a horrible feeling she already knew what it was. She didn't want to believe it because of what that meant for Arizona.

-

"She doesn't know does she?" Jessica whispered to her across the table. She shook her head and gazed at Callie's back. She caught the tensing of her shoulders, the way her step seemed to falter just for a second and the way it looked like she wanted to turn around. Callie had heard the whisper because she wasn't far enough away. "I'm sorry that happened to you Dr Robbins." Arizona almost missed the small voice from Jessica because of her watching of Callie but when she did she snapped back to the present. If Callie had heard then she would no doubt question her about it, and when that time came she would either tell her the truth or lie. She wasn't sure which was for the best.

"That's ok; it's not your fault. And what happened to you also wasn't your fault, just like what happened to me wasn't my fault." She grabbed Jessica's hand and squeezed it much like she had done when she had finished telling her about what had happened to her. "It took me a while to understand that, and it probably will take you a while too. But never, never think it was your doing. You said no." Jessica nodded at her, understanding it seemed what she was trying to tell her. "I'm so sorry Jessica but I have to get to work now. But I'm going to give you my work number and my mobile number and if you ever need to talk again just give me a call and we'll arrange something ok?"

Arriving back in her office she shut the door behind her and leant against it. She let out a big sigh and closed her eyes. Today was going to be a hard and long day.

-

Lunch time came around quickly and Arizona found herself sat at their usual table, she was the last to arrive. Callie, Mark, Owen, Teddy and Derek were all already there.

"Hey so did you hear?" Mark said, he looked giddy. That meant one thing: gossip.

"No. What?" Stealing a piece of apple off of his plate. He slapped her wrist.

"You're married." She nearly choked.

"What?"

"Yeah that's the new gossip haunting the halls of Seattle Grace hospital." He smiled pleased with himself for telling her. "And...Guess what." Arizona sighed; he still had a childish happy quality about him. There was more gossip. She snatched a sip from his drink, she scrunched up her nose: pineapple milkshake. He slapped her hand away from his tray again.

"What?"

"You also have a love child that you spent the morning talking to and paying off to never bother you again. She's of course taken after you and is pregnant so you've given her the number of a good clinic to take care of it for her like they have for you on many occasions."

"Why is all the gossip about me bad? The talk about you guys is mostly good. Derek you're McDreamy, Owen you're the unsung hero that's not only fearless but is in love, Teddy you're new sorry I haven't heard much, Callie everyone thinks you're a superstar. Even you has the whole McSteamy thing. I'm just the whore from nowhere that likes to get pregnant every few months." She pouted feeling oddly affected by the gossip. Callie smiled at her, that smile that meant she found her adorable and would probably make it up to her later.

"Don't worry Arizona no one actually thinks that, and no one's saying that...well apart from Mark. What he forgot to mention is that he started this rumour and it's only gotten as far as the people on this table. Don't worry the talk it good." Callie rubbed her shoulder and offered her a piece of fruit from her tray. Arizona ignored it and grabbed Mark's plate and finished off the last few pieces. The indistinct sound he made at her cheek made her giggle.

"Serves you right." She couldn't help but give into her inner child and poked her tongue out at him.

**Next chapter up soon hopefully, it's not written yet but I hope to very soon. Please review, I love knowing what you think. :D **


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: Sorry it's been so long I've had exams and assignment deadlines, all fun! Not! Lol So here's chapter twelve I think there will be one or two more chapters after this and then this is finished. Hope you like. Let me know what you think.

**WARNING:** There are mentions of rape and a somewhat graphic description.

-

_The darkness was everywhere. There was no escaping. Not for her. Never for her. Arizona could feel the beginnings of a panic attack. Her lungs felt like they were on fire, they couldn't drag in enough oxygen. She felt like she had been running all night. Everywhere she turned he was there. Every hiding place, every corner he appeared. He had found her after all this time and come to repeat what he had done to her all those years ago. She felt exactly like she did that night that everything had changed._

_She could smell his cologne, it sickened her the thought of having to smell him on her skin again made her want to wretch. Even after all this time she knew exactly what he smelt like. The feel of his hands on her skin, the roughness of them. She could even see the sick half smile on his face as he was getting his way with her. All of it made her sick. She wanted to scream, scream till her throat was red raw and someone came to save her. Anyone. But she couldn't, her voice wasn't working he had terrified her into silence._

_She felt his hand sliding between the skin of her pubic bone and the silk of her panties, the tightness of her jeans pressing his rough flesh harder into her. Bruising her. So different from the soft touch she was used to in the past. He didn't bother waiting as he slid his two fingers into her damaging her further. She struggled against his hold, she bit his shoulder till he let go and slid his other hand out of her jeans and tried to run for it screaming for help the entire time. She made it two strides before he grasped her wrist and tugged, she screamed out as she felt it snap. He pushed her down to the ground and the next thing she felt was his suffocating weight settle onto her. The whites of his eyes shone in the dark like the front lights on a car._

_"Your mine!" He snarled. Arizona struggled and struggled and she couldn't get out of his hold, she was helpless there was nothing she could do. Why did this have to happen to her again? Why did he have to find her?_

_"No!"_

-

Callie had worked a 36 hour shift and she was exhausted. It hadn't been busy but that just made the shift seem longer. She had been looking forward to seeing Arizona for hours now, she just wanted to curl up and fall asleep in each others arms. It had been nearly two weeks since the meeting between Jessica and Arizona in the cafeteria, since then her blonde girlfriend had exchanged texts and emails with the girl making sure she was ok. Jessica seemed to have been firmly placed under her wing reminding Callie of how kind and caring her girlfriend was, she had a huge heart.

Walking into the apartment she shared with Christina she was surprised to see Christina and Owen stood outside of her bedroom door with their ears pressed up against it. She lifted her eyebrow at them and cleared her throat waiting for them to notice her presence. She hoped they weren't listening to what she thought they were listening too. That would be too disturbing.

"Thank God your here, roller girl is having a nightmare or else she's dying. I was just about to go wake her up now you can. Goodnight." Christina sighed out as she walked past her dragging Owen with her into her own bedroom and closing the door behind them. Quickly shoving her coat and bag on the peg Callie made her way into her own room to see Arizona sprawled out in their bed, she had kicked the covers off and was moving around obviously distressed about something. Arizona occasionally in the past had had nightmares about her work, about the sick kids she couldn't save. It had taken Callie months to get her to talk about it, Arizona didn't like to dwell on her own problems, she much rather save everyone else and make it seem like she was ok. She quickly slipped her shoes off and slipped under the thin sheet and wrapped it around the blonde haired beauty. Holding her close and whispering her name trying to gently wake her. Tonight had been the first night since her talk with Jessica that she had agreed to spend the night in her apartment and that made Callie suspect these nightmares had been a frequent occurrence over the last two weeks.

"Come on baby wake up." She whispered into her ear and kissing it for good measure. Arizona's eyes flashed open quick as lightening and the panic and fear Callie saw in them broke her heart. Arizona struggled out of her grip, she was trembling in her arms and Callie was dumbfounded never before had the blonde shied away from her comfort after her nightmares, not since she had told her all about them. Giving Callie a push she jumped out of bed and flew across the room till her back was against the door. Callie felt her heart ache at the sight in front of her, usually her girlfriend was so happy and so confident and she had been reduced to a quivering wreck by whatever haunted her dreams. She was sure it was something to do with what she had overheard her and Jessica talking about. "Hey, Hey it's just me! Ari, it's me. Your Calliope. I'm not gonna hurt you, there's nothing here to be afraid of ok. It's safe. Your safe."

-

Arizona hadn't felt so freaked out and afraid in years. After her freak out upon waking up in someone's arms Callie had calmed her down and sat her on the bed telling her in a soothing tone to wait there and she'd make her a cup of hot chocolate. After waiting a whole two seconds and realising the dark corners and loneliness of the room wasn't helping her calm down and forget her dream she sped through to the kitchen and held onto the bottom of Callie's shirt whilst she made the hot drinks. It was moments like these that she remembered exactly why she loved her. People in the past hadn't let it go once they realised she had a nightmare, they'd quiz her and quiz her until it turned into an argument and then one of them either storming out and spending the night elsewhere or them breaking up. Callie wasn't like that though, she knew Arizona needed her time and space to feel comfortable about talking about certain things: And this certainly qualified as of one of those things.

"Here, just the way you like it." A huge mug of hot cocoa handed to her with a kiss. "So, I had the longest shift and it was so boring. Can you believe in my whole entire shift only two people had broken bones for me to fix. I shouldn't have bothered going in. I could have stayed with you, and our bed and hot cocoa all day and all night long." She smiled at her and Arizona's insides melted. She knew what she was trying to do, she was trying to take the tension out of the room and make her forget about her nightmare. Arizona suspected Callie had a good idea of what the nightmare had been about anyway, and it made her appreciate her knowing that she wasn't going to push her into talking about it. "What? Why are you smiling at me like that?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, you know that."

"No, I mean," Pausing to place her mug down and push herself into Callie's personal space she planted a long and lingering kiss on her lovely lips. "I really, _really_, love you and..." pausing to steal another kiss "I promise to tell you all about it, just...promise me you won't run away from me when I'm done."

"I promise, but Arizona you don't have to I mean there's-"

"I know, but I want you to know. I trust you. When I was in college I was dating a girl called Cindy and once weekend when she had gone home to visit her parents some friends of mine convinced me to go to a house party of someone they knew. It was a great party until the end, anyway so I'm not going to go into lots of detail you don't have to know that and frankly I can't talk about it yet but I got drugged and raped by a guy we all knew. He's in prison at the moment, I had to testify against him in front of everyone. Cindy didn't believe me, he was one of her friends he told her I had begged him for sex and she believed him. She announced it in front of everyone at graduation and broke up with me. It wasn't until later that she realised she was wrong, she wrote to me a few years ago and apologised. I never replied, I think maybe I should. Bygones and all that."

Callie couldn't believe the way in which Arizona talked about it she seemed like her mind was somewhere else, she was so detached from the conversation and the idle way she thought on whether or not to reply to an ex girlfriend. Callie had seen this before as an intern, it was common of rape victims and victims of sexual abuse to play down their ordeal and disassociate themselves from it. It was a coping mechanism. She could feel tears prickling at her eyes, she felt so angry that someone could do that to the perky blonde woman stood between her legs and staring at her so lovingly. Arizona also had tears prickling her eyes, the sight of her girlfriend obviously upset about her ordeal, to know she cared that much was so moving.

"Oh god Arizona, I'm so sorry that happened to you. I'm so sorry. I love you I'm never going to let anything like that happen to you again. I swear I'll do everything I can to make you feel safe and I will never _ever_ run away. I love you." She blinked back her tears not wanting to be a sobbing mess when Arizona held it altogether so well.

"I love you too. Do you think we could curl up together and watch the lion king? I don't want to do anything else tonight and I'm too awake to go to sleep yet. Do you think that would be ok? I know your exhausted but maybe you could fall asleep watching it with me? " The blonde was babbling she was so nervous, she still not 100% sure that the brunette wasn't going to run away the first chance she got. Now she had told her about it she just wanted to forget about it completely, she didn't want to talk, she didn't want to think she just wanted to watch her favourite disney movie with her favourite person.

"I think we most certainly can do that. Let me grab your hot cocoa you go get our quilt and I'll stick the movie in. How's that sound?" Arizona was already half way to the bedroom at that point.

"Perfect." She whispered.

A/N: I didn't go into much detail with what happened to Arizona when she's talking to Callie because I don't think realistically she would feel comfortable or want to make an account of all the details, not even to a loved one. What do think?

O, and thank you for all the reviews I love them and they're much appreciated :D

And how awesome in lion king? I watched it recently for the first time in years and it didn't disappoint.


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: This is the last chapter :'( I'm sad to see it go but also kind of relieved as I was having some serious bouts of writers block. Thanks for everyone that has been reading and for everyone who has reviewed. It's been great. Tell me what you think of this last chapter?

-

It had been two days since she had told her what had happened. Arizona didn't know what to expect after telling Callie about what had happened to her. She had expected the panic, she had expected the fear and shame but she could never have predicted to feel relief. She felt relieved that she was able to tell her about it without breaking down, she felt relieved that Callie hadn't ran away from her, and she was most definitely relieved that she was dating such a miraculous woman as Calliope. This was the most committed and grown up relationship Arizona had ever had and she wasn't scared.

Since what happened in college, how Cindy had left her after the rape and everything, she had steered away from serious relationships. Not that she slept around or anything mind you just that she never could imagine being with the women she dated forever, they were only there for right now. She loved them to some extent but they weren't the one for her. Ever since Callie had so unexpectedly touched her heart in Joe's that night she had felt so utterly in love and so overwhelmed by it that she had forgotten to feel afraid. There just hadn't been room for it.

"What are you thinking about?" Callie asked quirking her eyebrow at her as she stared down at her whilst they lay together on the couch. Quirking her own eyebrow back at her girlfriend she smirked at her and moved till she straddled her lap.

"Oh I don't know, just how" Kiss "wonderful" Kiss "my" Kiss" super hot girlfriend is. You know, the usual." She smiled knowing full well how Calliope reacted to her dimples.

"Really? Now she" Kiss "sounds amazing. You'll have to introduce us cause your attractive and everything but she sounds hot as hell. Maybe we could hook up." Scoffing at her girlfriends playfulness Arizona used her hands which had been teasing Callie's sides to tickle her. Laughter soon filled the living room and Callie shrieked as Arizona refused to stop. "Uncle! Uncle! Ari stop please. I didn't mean it. Your hot, super hot, your breathtaking!" Callie squirmed her way out from underneath her, she stood up looking completely crumpled from thrashing round on the couch. "Your impossible." She smiled at the blonde on the sofa.

"You love it." Arizona pouted whilst looking up at Callie from underneath her eyelashes. She loved the effect she had on the brunette, it was just the same as the effect Callie had on her. Arizona felt loved in every look Callie sent her way. She was her one. Grabbing her hand, Callie dragged her up.

"Yes I do, now lets go make use of this empty apartment before my shift starts." Waggling her eyebrows Callie pulled her into her bedroom and shut the door behind them.

-

Arizona had the day off so after thoroughly taking care of Calliope's needs and walking her to the hospital for her shift she text Christina offering to take her out for a coffee. Surprisingly they had become fast friends after their few drunken escapades. Arizona felt she understood her a bit better after some of the drunken confessions she had heard. Christina, much like herself, didn't always understand people.

"So rollerskate girl, how are things with my flatmate? No more drama please!" Christina certainly had a way about her that was disconcerting if you didn't now her. Rolling her eyes at the nickname that she couldn't seem to get the cardio resident to drop.

"No more drama at least not this week. In relationships there are ups and down and I have learnt to embrace them. Me and Callie might not always get along but I love her she loves me and that is all that matters." Smiling at the thought of the ortho surgeon busy at work, even when she wasn't near her she could give her chills.

"Oh god, your happy. You've been brainwashed, I always knew you were perky, your not called McPerky for nothing but I thought you had potential. These past few months we've had some serious depressed hardcore drinking going on. Now it's all ruined." Christina sunk back in her chair looking seriously put out. Arizona frowned for a moment wondering if she was honestly put out with the good news in their relationship. Deciding its best not to comment on that she skipped along in the conversation she was sure Christina was secretly happy for them.

"So, how are you and Owen?"

"Don't ask."

"I just did, you have to talk about it sometime."

"No I don't."

"Christina."

"Rollerskate girl."

"Your acting worse than some of my patients...and they're five."

"Fine, what do you want to know? Teddy, who basically at the moment is my hero, is in love with my boyfriend, who neglected to tell this to me. Then I basically offer him to her if she carried on teaching me in the heat of the moment. Your love life is perfect mine is falling apart so excuse me for not wanting to talk about it."

"Oh." Pursing her lips whilst assessing the load of information just given to her.

"Yes OH"

"No I just thought that with him forgiving you for wanting to trade him and him choosing you over Teddy even though they've been best friends forever and been to war together that it was romantic and that you could see how much he is in love with you. That's all. I don't see why it should fall apart." Stirring her cup of coffee innocently whilst peering at Christina out of the corner of her eye she saw her slouch back into her chair and drink the last out of her cup frowning.

"You know I liked you a lot more when you were a depressive drinker." Arizona frowned at that comment, even though they had become fast friends she still found it difficult to understand Christina.

"You don't want to be friends with me anymore? Just because I'm happy."

"I didn't say that. I need another coffee."

-

Tapping her foot impatiently Callie couldn't wait for her shift to end, she just had to finish her charts and then she could leave. She had received a text from her cheery girlfriend on her lunch break telling her that everyone was going to Joe's for drinks after their shifts and that Arizona was also going to go. They had all finished before her and she was anxious to get there. Over the last few months Arizona had really settled into her group of friends, many of them becoming her own. At first Callie had been worried because she knew what they were like, especially Christina, Meredith and Alex, they didn't like new people and Arizona was definitely new people but like usual she had nothing to worry about Arizona dazzled them just like she had her.

Walking into the bar she instantly spotted them near the back with pitchers of beer and shot glasses already littering the table top. They had obviously all been in the festive mood tonight. Sliding up to her girlfriend and after saying hello to everyone she dropped a long awaited kiss on her girlfriends perfect lips, she loved the unique taste that was Arizona. Meaning for it to only be a peck hello, but happily surprised when Arizona slung her arm around her neck and slipped her tongue inside her mouth for a quick hello.

"Mmmm what was that for luscious?" Callie could taste the alcohol on her lips and smiled at the glazed look in her eye. Arizona was definitely tipsy.

"It was a hello kiss, but I think someone, a blonde someone is feeling the effects of a few drinks tonight." Arizona mockingly looked around at their company as if wondering who she was talking about. "It's most definitely not a bad thing." She smiled.

"Oh god your happiness is suffocating the rest of us." Christina moaned but soon leaned in and kissed Owen in a similar fashion as Arizona had her. Afterwards he looked similarly dazed. Lifting an eyebrow at Mark for an explanation as to why Christina and Arizona seemed far more effected by the alcohol than the rest of them.

"Don't look at me it seems these two monsters spent the day together and got here before everyone else. It's like she's Jekyl and she's Hyde. Scary."

"Ass." Arizona slung at him.

"Barbie."

"Cradle robber."

"Child."

"Manwhore."

"Whore."

"DI-"

"Ok, ok we get the picture. You two stay away from each other. Babe, you want another drink?"

"Wine please."

Smiling and nodding as she got up out of her seat and made her way to the bar she couldn't think of how lucky she was. She had a great set of people on her side, she had a slightly immature but always there for her best friend and on top of all that she had the most beautiful and amazing girlfriend who she could easily picture spending the rest of her life with. Lost in her thought she jumped slightly when she felt two familiar arms wrap around her waist as she waited at the bar. She soon felt a kiss on the back on her neck.

"Hmm, you know what?" The blonde behind her whispered tantalizingly in her ear. Tingles erupted throughout her body at the sound of her husky whispered voice.

"What?"

"We're all going to be ok, especially me and you. You're the one Calliope Torres. You make me a good man in the storm and I love you. I love you everyday and you make everything worth while. Forever."

"I love you too Arizona Robbins. Forever."

THE END

AN: Thanks once again to everyone that has been reading and to those who have reviewed.


End file.
